As far as I can remember back I always wanted to be 30 year old. When I was eighteen I was plump and upset not just the way I looked but I felt the whole world is against me and no one understands me at all. I thought being thirty is cool. I wasn’t happy in my twenties, I was been in love too many times, I got married but I still left with that “I don’t know what a hell I’m doing here “feeling. On the top of that I’ve been in love with someone who I shouldn’t fall in love (Mr.Garner gate)with and first time in my life I had to face with that fact my marriage is a disaster, and I become a job hopper in a foreign country and, my best friends are not around me anymore as they are living in different countries. I was left with me, myself, and I and it wasn’t the best company.
My mum is always describing her look as a bulldog referring to her wrinkles, but I told her many times to be proud of your wrinkles as all those little lines on our faces is a proof of life ,happiness ,laugh ,pain ,crazy moments ,joy ,pleasure ,beautiful feelings .On next weekend I will be thirty years old ,my wish will come true but when I look in to the mirror I could shout” Wrinkleeeeeeeeeeess ,oh my God I look like a bulldog”.
I love my body and I love my life. I learned how to appreciate my beauty and how to love myself. I have great life with a great family, great friends and I’ve been loved by great men’s.
I’m still a fourteen year old inside with full of questions. I’m still believe in Santa, and anytime I feeling sad I pop in to the Disney shop and I give a big hug to Tigger .I love hugging people, I’m a scary huggy monster and I can’t take the life serious .I’m still wearing Tinkle Bell socks, and I have Superman G-strings and I can believe penguins can fly if they really want. My favourite cartoon is South Park,Cartman rocks. I can’t cook, I’m not obsessed with cleaning and I’m crap with money. I’m not a people pleaser and I’m sarcastic (my ex brain-dead trainer has loved it).I love being Bernie.
The unconditional love has changed my life.
Being thirty is cool. I’m on my way.